“Am I depressed?” This is the question that sad people may ask themselves when they feel at loss as to what they can do about it. Sadness, however, is a normal feeling. Even overwhelming sadness is standard to someone who has just experienced the death of a loved one. Sadness though becomes abnormal when it comes out of the blue and the person can’t really explain the reason for his despair. “Am I depressed?” then becomes an inquiry that signifies that it may be crucial for an individual to see a doctor who has the authority to address his concerns. Some of the things that doctors may say about depression are as follows:

• Characteristics of depression include persistent feelings of inadequacy, a low mood and a general loss of interest in pleasurable things. People who are troubled by the disorder don’t necessarily ask themselves “Am I depressed?” but because they may not understand how they feel, it’s possible for them to not know what they should do about it. It’s important for those around them to help them by communicating and bringing to their attention the availability of health services for their distress.

• Some of the factors that affect depression are negative thinking and low self-esteem. Because of this, there are mental health facets that try to encourage individuals who may be on the verge of depression to engage in self-esteem activities that can boost this aspect of their personalities.

But what are self-esteem activities?

• Self-esteem activities are processes that intend to boost an individual’s perception of his worth. In a clinical sense, this could be Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy wherein irrational thoughts are analyzed and reconstructed into more rational ones. For instance, someone who sees himself as inferior could be asked to make a list of his reasons for such thinking, explore their root and to engage in a behavior that would challenge these negative thoughts.

• Social Support in some way can be considered as a self-esteem activity that includes family and friends. Notwithstanding the fact that there are people who are very critical of others, there are also those who are not like them. The warmth, affection, love and understanding from these individuals may encourage those who may be depressed to feel that they are worthy of love and of life.

• Play therapy may help improve the self-esteem of children who are depressed. Play therapy allows them to become aware of their capacities and their concerns which may eventually lead to better self-esteem. For example, in the play process a child may be asked to give a clay model of Mr. Potato Head various expressions. The child may consistently give the toy a sad face. The reasons for the sad face could then be explored by the child and the counselor thereby resolving the child’s issues.

The above are only few of the many things that people could do in order to lessen depression, build self-esteem or self confidence and increase motivation to live.

Danielle is gifted with artistic hands that could put Picasso and Da Vinci at bay. Her paintings are full of life and are all original masterpieces. Ever since she was a child, Danielle has always dreamed of becoming a painter and owning an art studio – a dream that was far from the law firm that her family ran.

Today Danielle is a zombie working for her family’s law firm. Although she has good job performance, she just couldn’t put her heart and soul in it. She took up law after college because her father encouraged her to take a more ‘sensible’ path. The field demanded much of her time that she stopped painting, stopped practicing her art and stopped living her dream.

As Danielle’s best friend, I couldn’t bear to see her watch her life pass her by. I knew that I had to do something. I had to remind her of how different she was before. Then, she was teeming with life and pulsating with motivation. Now, she is as animated as a brick. I had to motivate her once more. While cooking up ideas on how to help Danielle, I remembered that Montaigne once said ‘The pleasant things in the world are pleasant thoughts: and the great art of life is to have as many of them as possible.’ So I bought my friend a book compilation on motivational thoughts.

Here are some examples of the motivational thoughts contained in the book:

• It’s YOUR Life, Live BIG – Josh Hind. If you want to eventually succeed, you need to do things that would move you closer to it. You just can’t dilly-dally and drag your feet around. However, if your dream is consists entirely of watching TV for hours on end, then by all means, drag your feet as much as you can.

• There is no elevator to success. You have to take the stairs. You’re a service company with a single employee! Being in autopilot will lead you no where near success. Who is responsible for your success? Look in the mirror. Don’t settle on being a follower—be a lifelong learner and leader.

• In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity – Albert Einstein. Tomas Alva Edison made 10, 000 wrong choices in the process of making the incandescent bulb. His only reply was that he now knew ten thousand ways by which it cannot be done.

• We don’t grow unless we take risks. Any successful company is riddled with failures – James E. How will you know if you will pass a class in physics if you don’t even take it? It is always better to try and fail than to live a lifetime of regret knowing that you had the chance to succeed.

• To be successful, you must decide exactly what you want to accomplish then resolve to pay the price to get it – Bunker Hunt. Success is earned. It is not like manna that will simply fall down from heaven. Decide what you want then work for it no matter how many boulders block your path.

• Life is like a bicycle – villagehero.com. The moment you stop pedaling, you start losing momentum. If you coast for too long, you fall. If your goal is something worth pursuing, do something to move you closer to it.

• This above all, to thine own self be true – Shakespeare. What’s the point of being someone you’re not? Will you forever wear that mask? Because it IS tiring—and sooner or later you’ll have to take it off.

• “Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, and the Wisdom to know the difference” – The Serenity Prayer. Change is the only thing permanent. You have to learn to accept it. Not living your dream right at this moment doesn’t automatically mean that you will forever not be able to reach it, because if you really want to live your dream, you will find a way to do so.

I am sure that Danielle found the book that I gave her beneficial because when I visited her yesterday, she looked happier. Perhaps you are also in need of motivation. Well, I am positive that the above motivational thoughts could also help you. But you have to remember that these motivational thoughts will remain nothing but words unless you make them your own. They are there to guide your actions, not to make the actions happen. They can help mold your attitude but they cannot do the whole thing for you. They can influence you to change your perspective but they cannot maintain that perspective for you. You are the one responsible for the action. Napoleon Hill said “Man, alone, has the power to transform his thoughts into physical reality; man alone, can dream and make his dreams come true’.

I walked in on Dino doing the craziest thing I have ever seen—saying HI to the sun! When Dino caught me staring at him aghast, he blurted out, “What? This is my self-esteem activity for the day!”

I would have thought Dino was just getting in touch with his schizophrenic tendencies. But when Dino began explaining to me about his so-called self esteem activities, I began to think that maybe I am the one with schizophrenic tendencies for not knowing about them. According to Dino, self esteem activities are simple activities that help individuals build self-esteem in just an hour a day. They help reaffirm one’s worth and increase self-confidence. Here are a few daily activities Dino sneaks in his everyday schedule to help him boost his self-esteem:

• Write down five things you’re good at and tack it on the ceiling. Give at least five minutes to read the words before starting the day.

• Keep a thought for a day calendar – you get a mouthful of uplifting messages along with your daily dosage of caffeine.

• Have an inspirational or self-help book handy in your bag or car when you go nuts over waiting in line, traffic, or being in an elevator.

• Be a singing sensation—in the bathroom! Choose a song that describes what you want in life and belt it out in the shower. This releases endorphins and helps in blood circulation.

• Set aside an hour during the weekends to accomplish small tasks such as planting flowers.

• Make your bathroom mirror a collage of affirmations! So every time you brush your teeth, you can look in the mirror and repeat three things you like about yourself!

• Capture moments and preserve them for a lifetime by keeping a journal.

• Smile—it’s not as hard and it won’t cost you a penny.

• Take time to do things you enjoy but also learn something new.

• Have a sense of humor! Jokes literally litter everywhere! Do everyone a favor and pick them up!

• Do silly things—and do them one more time!

• Let your creativity flow—write a poem, paint a picture, do a sculpture.

• Think of somebody you love.

• Clean your bathroom. Remodel your room.

• Make some lists: 20 things you know how to do, 5 great achievements in your life, 10 strengths you have, etc.

• Talk to people. Someone under age 6—it’s fun. Talk to someone over age 70—it’s full of wisdom.

• Have, or better yet, give a massage! Personal touch can give you wonders!

How do you gain self-esteem for free? Simply have fun and do the things you enjoy the most. You don’t need money nor do you need to be a genius to build self-esteem. Appreciating and doing the tiny tasks (and even just a little “me” time) will create the happiness you are searching for. Self esteem activities can help you love your self, love others, and love life.